It Seems No Matter What I Do…
You ever get that feeling sometimes, that no matter what you do it’s never good enough.
I’ve been feeling that way almost my entire life. I know when I was younger it stemmed from my father’s attitude, but I can’t use that as an excuse now.
I just got back from shooting pool. I’ve been shooting pool since I was 11 years old. I shot my ass off tonight and I still couldn’t fucking win.
I know what they mean when they say, “I got burnt out” Because that sure as hell is how I’m feeling now.
It got me thinking about my life and the things that use to make me happy don’t make me happy anymore and I’m having a helluva’ time trying to figure out what does.
Right now, I’m feeling like a completely useless human being. Now, you can take that anyway you want, but that’s how I feel right now.
I don’t even know why I’m posting this shit anyway.
I need to feel useful again. If I”m going to survive in this God awful world. I need to feel useful again.