I Love You Dad

Growing up it was difficult for me to get close to you.  I always thought there was this wall you built up around yourself that I couldn’t break.  I always thought, “How do you express to someone like that, that you love them.”  Would they know?  You gave me life, as much as I’ve taken that for granted I can’t deny that I’ve appreciated the way that you respected my independence.  You never tried to push your thoughts or beliefs on me.  You guided me in what you thought was the right direction and you prayed that God would do the rest.  You did great dad.

When the two of you got divorced, we grew apart and I never forgave myself for that but I don’t have to regret it.  I still have you.  You can still be in my life.  As tough as you were when we were growing up you’re realizing your immortality.  How can someone who’s taken care of themselves their entire life be experiencing so much pain?

You’ve been one of the constants in my life.  I’m not ready to let you go.  I realize, that with all I’ve experienced in my life, that I can express to you how I feel and I will know you understand.

I love you.  I always have.  You’re my dad.  You’re the only one I’ve got and I’m not ready to let you go yet.  You understand me?  So fight, as long and as hard as you can.  I will be there to support you and push you to do what you need to do to live just a bit longer.  I’m not done with you yet.  I know that’s selfish, but there are so many things I still need tell you.  I can only hope and pray that I take advantage of the time that is given to me.

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About phillystarvingwriter

Starving writer with a day job hoping one day to make a living doing what I love best.

Posted on May 10, 2011, in Unfinished Work. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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